Most women have this mentality, ‘my money is mine, but your money is ours.’
Last week one of the trending stories was how a woman was given 35 million naira by her father, but she refused to disclose it to her husband. Why is this so popular? Why do many women hide their money from their husbands or even boyfriends?
According to society, men are ‘supposed’ to be the providers
A system that regards men as the providers is hard to get rid of. Say what you want about the patriarchy, but one thing is for sure, it will always remain because it favours women in some situations.
From the time a woman is born, society is grooming her to get a husband who will take care of her and men are told to work hard, so they can take care of their families. With that mindset, most women aren’t thinking of sharing whatever money they have with their husbands, they are more concerned with receiving, and men too are more concerned with providing.
Most men don’t truly want richer wives
Women grew up thinking that their husbands would cater to their financial needs and not the other way around.
A quick way for most men to feel disrespected and most women to become discontented is when a woman becomes richer than her man and starts taking care of him. If she shows off that she has more money, he might not feel like the ‘head’ of the home anymore.
So, it’s not just women who want rich husbands, some men do not want richer wives. Of course, few people exist who do not think like this, but they are in the majority.
Some women have been swindled by men
Some women have given men money, and what was the end result? They ran off with their money or spent it on other women. Once bitten, twice shy, right? Many women do not want to become a ‘fool’ for love, giving men all their life savings just to be cheated on at the end of the day.
Stingy husbands make stingy wives
Most women won’t want to spend all her money paying rent, fueling the car, taking care of the kids and buying her own personal items.
If a woman marries a man that does not even attempt to assume the role of a provider and it’s usually a battle to get him to foot any bill, she would not be happy to use her own money for the upkeep of the family and might lie about how much she’s earning, so he can step up.
Concluding thoughts
Marriage means you pool resources together, you are supposed to become one, it’s literally in the meaning of marriage. While it’s important to have your own money, there should be a space for ‘our money’. Two have become one flesh, and hiding things from each other is not the best way to enjoy your marriage.
